How do I deal with mother in law living a double life? (living with 1 man engaged to another?)?

[chika]

Even though you care for your mother in law, you need to stay out of her "relationships". Believe it or not, she is still trying to "deal" with the death of your father in law and even if some things may not make sense to you and you see it as "crazy" you will find that there is a reasoning behind the madness. Continue being her daugher in law, do not prohibit her from seeing her own grandchildren. Do not isolate her further because maybe that is what Guy #2 wants. If you dont trust the person your mom in law is dating, you could always be around while your kids visit their grandma. You dont have to punish her just because she may not be making the best choices. Why would you also punish the children and prohibit them from seeing their grandma? Think about the best part of growing up is having grandparents doting on you! Don't deprive your kids of that. There is always a saying that you never get in the middle of relationships because you will be the only one who will come out screwed.