MAD at sister for making me divorce!!!!!!!?

by **stein74** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:01 am

So my sister cheered me on ....adviced me to divorce because she said your husband doesnt want you, he dumped you, he divorced you so start the divorce "its only a piece of paper if he wants to get with you ..you guys can stop the paperwork anytime....its only paper"......also" take him to court get money from him!!"...........

Story: im 30 hes 40...been married 4 yrs. no kids.
My husband wanted a 3 month space: he said" to work on our marriage/problems, i will put as much effort into it....only 3 months honey, dont lease anything"...he explained in very friendly way that we will work on our problems in 3 months and he needs space.

He said we both need to move out of apt...so i looked for roomates on my own, did my own move...cleaned the apt. really nice..he said dont use bank acct. i said ok. i was supporting myself for almost 4 months!

During 3 months: he didnt call me, he didnt see me. ONly emails he said: " i know this is difficult for you, its difficult for me too, give me time i'll come around..ilove you"....he would write these emails during 3 month course.

End of 3 months my dad called him: he complained to my dad about me, blamed marriage on me..that he suffered 4 years...he broke up with me via email and said " i dont want to see you, i dont want drama or scene"...i pushed him to see him..i talked to him for 2 hrs,,,i cried, begged,,talked ...he didnt care ...he complained and said im here to break up with you.

I gave him another month to think it over...he kept emailing me "im not in love with you"..."i lost respect for you...you deserve someone who will love and respect you".....and " i am not ready to be with you nor can I give you a hint of ever wanting to be with you in future.... ""please dont make this harder than it is".

His last email was " " i will file for divorce". .....and i talked to my sister she CHEERed me on to file so i can get money from him and take him to court!! she said its only piece of paper if he wants you you guys can stop the divorce anytime"

after i filed my husband was so MAD at me he said" your canniving." " i always knew your after my money" and he said why did you list my business and houses on paper!!!!!!!! he was MAd why i listed his assets.....lawyer was askiing me all these questions...i was emotional i didnt iknow what i was DOING!!!

Im MAD at sister for she ended my marriage!!!!! if she didnt make me FILE...my husband would maybe come back to me......there was a Chance he would come back to me?????? she ruined it!!!! she ended my marriage!!!!!! and after she said i cant help you because i have my own family to take care of............Seek professional help dont stress me.

Im MAD...SAD and confused........is it my fault? im the bad guy????? i ended my marriage???????? I blame myself,,,im MAD at myself for filing.

HELP please

by **bing49** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:03 am

i know it hurts that you still love him,but he will file the divorce anyway. If he wanted to fix your marriage,he should have gotten back to you already. He is angry that you filed divorce because you put in all his assets. He intends to not give you anything. Your sister will always be your sister, and she loves you. She knows divorce is coming and she wants you to get money to secure yourself. She really cares for you. She knows you deserve better. I do too. Just hang in there.

by **elkan80** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:10 am

You marriage had been over way before you filed for divorce.
Get over it.

By the way: people who work on making their marriage work, do so by working TOGETHER. not by being apart for months with no contact. If that wasn't a red flag, I don't know what would be a sign for you, except maybe getting slapped in the face with divorce papers.

You sister didn't ruin your marriage. You marriage had been over for quite some time.

by **brenn15** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:14 am

Your husband is the a****** here...you did nothing wrong, you tried to make it better...your sister shouldn't have pushed you into anything but you cant be mad at her for this its you x husband's fault not yours or your sisters

by **artzai** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:16 am

R U PHUCKING KIDDING ME! You're actually putting this on your sister? Look, I don't like the whole "get money from him bit", but OBVIOUSLY your husband didn't want you anymore and the marriage was OVER. God, have some respect for yourself.

by **bret11** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:25 am

First of all you can't blame your sister if you listened to her advice. She is just trying to help and support you in your decision and it doesn't seem like your husband wanted to be with you anymore but it is weird that he got mad at you for filing for divorce when he was going to the same. Maybe he just cares about he ego and wanted it to look like he divorced you and not the other way around

by **adin55** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:27 am

Here's the deal (sorry):

Your husband didn't want your marriage anymore...but he didn't want to lose any of his money to you. So he moved out, started having sex with someone else, and planned on dragging you along for as many years as he could get away with it so that he wouldn't have to split assets with you.

Your sister did you a favor.

And for the record, you are responsible for your choices. The next time you don't like someone's advice, don't take it.

In the meantime, celebrate the fact that you got rid of your jerk of a so-called "husband". There are plenty of better fish in the sea. Take care.

by **alburt** » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:30 am

your husband wants to divorce you and leave you penniless. he didn't even want to see you to tell you in person. why do you think he's coming back he's probably got a young hot girl to trot about with and didn't want you to know so you wouldn't take him to court.

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