Mother-in-law issues...?

by **adusa37** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:01 pm

Ok, I will try to be brief! I really would like to know what you guys think, I just want to make sure it's not me being crazy about this. My hubby and I had a baby girl 8 weeks ago and she is the first grandchild of the family. All went well until last weekend when we were visiting my in laws. All my mother in law wanted to do was introducing her grand daughter to as many of her friends as possible. A heap of people came around to see her and she ended up being unsettled for ages because she was being picked up by every person possible. Obviously she didn't care because she got what she wanted. Then the day after she wanted to take her around to her neighbour's, whose daughter was there too and had shingles. I found out that you can contract chickenpox from shingles and as my baby is not immune to it yet, I refused to go. My mother in law got very upset because she really wanted to introduce her to her neighbour and she did not speak to me until we left and she is still very cold towards me a week on. It has always been all about her. What would be a good way to tell her she is in the wrong? My hubby agrees with me, he spoke up but she does not seem to listen. It's not all about her anymore!! Thanks for your help.

by **dickens93** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:04 pm

offer to make her like pasta or potato bake as an apology then mix rat poison in the piece you server her. that will get your point across

by **urian27** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:06 pm

I've seen this in the movies. And they usually do something really bad to the mother in law.

Bu in this case, try trapping her with no where to go and just talking to her. Unless she agrees and understands what you've said - do not let her free.

by **caelin** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:12 pm

I can understand what you are going through, and unless she uses reason in her everyday life, you have to just put her in her place, using tact of course. That is if there is any room left in her over sized mouth, or butt.

by **motega** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:22 pm

Try explaining to her why you didn't want to go. Tell her that it's not because you didn't want to go, but it's because you're worried about your baby.

by **scirwode** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:28 pm

You must act now or you will have years of misery and conflict,its your baby and she should not be passed around like a parcel,you have the control you know,if she wants to see her grandchild she has to obey your rules! Let her be cold towards you,what do you care,you have to protect your daughter,that is your job now,and you must do it well,dont expect your husband to be much help,sons rarely stand up to their mothers,you could ask him to grow a backbone but it might not happen,,of course she should be in your daughters life,but on your terms,just tell her you will bring up your daughter your way and that includes who she sees! Be firm because she will try and divide you,your husband must back you up,explain to him that it is not about his mother now but what is best for his daughter. Good luck,and remember,its you who has the power,she has none,keep saying that while smiling sweetly at her!

by **rheged** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:32 pm

Another evil stepmum strikes again! Seriously though you are very right as your daughter is only weeks old and shouldn't be passed around like that.

At that age it's important to keep them safe from catching colds etc from people, so you were very generous to let her be shown off like that already. I agree that you shouldn't allow your baby to be near anybody who is ill, who knows how it would affect her.

Your mother in law may want to show her off to everybody, but couldn't she have taken photos instead?

You can try and talk to her to explain, however if she's the stubborn type then let her stew. You didn't do anything wrong and shouldn't have to keep trying to reason with her.

If she wants to miss out on seeing her grandaughter, then let her get on with it. She will hopefully realise her immature behaviour won't work, then may act her age.

Good luck with everything, especially with motherhood.

Another evil stepmum strikes again! Seriously though you are very right as your daughter is only weeks old and shouldn't be passed around like that.

At that age it's important to keep them safe from catching colds etc from people, so you were very generous to let her be shown off like that already. I agree that you shouldn't allow your baby to be near anybody who is ill, who knows how it would affect her.

Your mother in law may want to show her off to everybody, but couldn't she have taken photos instead?

You can try and talk to her to explain, however if she's the stubborn type then let her stew. You didn't do anything wrong and shouldn't have to keep trying to reason with her.

If she wants to miss out on seeing her grandaughter, then let her get on with it. She will hopefully realise her immature behaviour won't work, then may act her age.

Good luck with everything, especially with motherhood.

by **tupac** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:38 pm

Another evil stepmum strikes again! Seriously though you are very right as your daughter is only weeks old and shouldn't be passed around like that.

At that age it's important to keep them safe from catching colds etc from people, so you were very generous to let her be shown off like that already. I agree that you shouldn't allow your baby to be near anybody who is ill, who knows how it would affect her.

Your mother in law may want to show her off to everybody, but couldn't she have taken photos instead?

You can try and talk to her to explain, however if she's the stubborn type then let her stew. You didn't do anything wrong and shouldn't have to keep trying to reason with her.

If she wants to miss out on seeing her grandaughter, then let her get on with it. She will hopefully realise her immature behaviour won't work, then may act her age.

Good luck with everything, especially with motherhood.

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