My mom is marrying an Abusive ASSHOLE?

[mate]

Last Summer, my moms boyfriend moved in. They'd only been dating like 2 months. No one in my family has ever liked him. He's selfish and rude and well just really inconsiderate of women. My mom seems to ignore all of his flaws. Anyways, last summer, my mom and i got in a tiff about how i'd been acting. It wasn't a big deal, but we were arguing when her boyfriend broke through a locked door and started screaming uncontrollably in my face and had me cornered against a desk. I was scared and didnt know what to do, I kept trying to get away but he would push me back, so i eventually ended up trying to punch him to get away. I was 17, and 92 lbs. He then picked me up by my shirt and waist and threw me across the room against a wall.
My dad made me file a police report, but due to CA state law, and lack of evidence, nothing happened with it.

To lead on, my mom had promised me he was leaving and never coming back. I left home for 2 weeks to get away, came back and he was still living with us. Now they're scheduled to get married next April, but no one in my family supports it and she doesn't notice. We've all tried telling her but she doesn't care.
She pushed away her best friends of 18 years because of him, and she doesn't know that on her fathers death bed, he told me he couldn't stand to see them together and how much he was sorry for me because he hated her boyfriend. No one likes him, not her 6 kids, or her mom and 2 sisters. But non of them have the heart to tell her because they don't want to hurt her.

What can i do? I feel so betrayed by my mom for staying with him and now getting married, and i cant even fathum forgiving her for letting him back in after last summer. I feel like she doesn't even care what happened, when im permanently scarred and have talked to several counselors about it. .

[ludano17]

U and ur siblings run away from home and see how ur mom feels because her boyfriend is so rude!!

[hanan]

The funny thing is...you could have just left when that argument went down and stayed with your father through graduation...but instead you went back. Leads me to beleive that things at home with the "@sshole" aren't really as bad as you make them out to be...

You can go ahead and tell her the world hates her fiance...it won't make a difference. Deal with it. She's an adult and it's her choice. You don't have to like it.

I feel betrayed that you make this guy out to seem like an abuser but you just keep going back for more...consider moving in with your father.

[giulio]

I'm sorry to hear this. I'm a mom and I can't imagine allowing my children's father to mistreat them let alone some dude I was dating! Your mother loves you but unfortunately is one weak woman. Her identity is clearly not one of a healthy woman who should protect and put her children first.

You don't have anything to feel guilty about not supporting or attending your mothers wedding. You obviously know you can't change someone but you can change how you respond to them and their choices....even if it is your own mother." try writing her a letter stating how you feel. Let her know that you are stil her little girl on the inside who wants to know mom will put her first and protect her and your family unit from harm. Tell her you are letting her go for as long as he is in hr life....that you will be there only if she decides that her family, her child means more than some man who wants to control and bully the family. Ask her to reach deep inside of herself and find the mother and woman she can be proud of and more importantly, her children can be proud of and trust. Then you need to stay with your father or as far away as possible. This relationship will dissolve on its own. Your mother is a big girl and she will need to find out what it's like to have only him. Then she'll see what you mean. She already does but is caught up in the drama and noise and she's not listening to her own heart.

I will pray for all of you. Good luck.