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[wattekinson86]

what age are they? insist that its is not a secret, there's just some things that are better understood as an adult, no matter how grown up they think they are! "we will talk about it when ur both old enough.." whatever age that seems appropriate to u. but do give them hope, and if they puff and pout put ur foot down. don't severely punish their healthy curiosity but do not accept their crap either, ur not just a mother ur a woman with needs and feelings. make them know it. best of luck.

[starling]

It sounds like you are doing all the right things so there isn't much to say. Ignore the accusations from your ex and tell your kids to keep it to themselves. That's why you left him and you don't need his abuse secondhand. Who cares if they're mad at you. You are doing what's best for them even if they don't know it. You're the parent and things are going to be a bit rocky while you try to find some solid ground. Keep searching and learning. You'll find your way. Use this time to invest in you right now. It will make you a better mother and human being. I'll send out a prayer for you:)

[iker]

How old are your children? depending on theyre age, I would tell them. it sounds like its something that they need to hear for themselves. but dont let them manipulate or bully you into telling them. let them know as long as they keep bugging you, then you will not tell them. then when they stop asking, pick a time, on your time to sit down and talk to them. im sure you know how to word things for a child.
I have a child but my child is only 1. But I can relate to this a little because when I was 5 my mother gave me up and put me into foster care. She was able to get me back when I was 10 and I hounded her and hounded her about why she did it and was telling her what people on the streets were saying, such as she was on drugs or prostituting. I was pretty rude to her for what she did, but when she finally told me she just said that she realized she could not take care of me financially and had no help. as I got older she told me the full story that my father did not believe i was his child and he would not help her take care of me and she "loved him" so much she did not want to sue him for child support so she just gave me up.. my suggestion is to tell the children. but just put it in child terms