Confused Indian Muslim Husband. Divorce (talaq) or bow to threats.?

[dana]

I am 30-year-old Muslim, married under Shariate Law performed by Qazi and received Nikhanama from Qazi and registered the same in Wakf board to get marriage certificate from Wakf. We both are muslims and working in mnc. It has been 4 years of our marriage and we quite often have silly arguments and she use to run away to her parents house. She hardly lived 2 years with me in these 4 years of our marriage. Last year she went to her parent’s house over an argument and she never returned for 6 months unless I agreed to her demand to take separate house, as we use to live with my parents in my own house. I took rented house and within couple of months she repeated by deserting me and I vacated that rented house the next month and moved back to my own house where my parents living. It’s been 5 months now, she didn’t take my calls nor replied my emails, we met once in these 5 months, then she demanded me to take separate house again and she'll not talk to my family members and i should not force her to talk/respect anyone from my family nor i should ask her to come along with me to my parents for festivals/functions. I straight away denied to it and we both were ok to take mutual divorce in that case as it is not going to resolve anymore and she never take my calls ever after that, so I went to Shariate council and Qazi suggested to send the Personal notice to her, copying Shariate Council and their advocate, asking her to return as early as possible. Council asked me sign power of attorney, which I denied as it has some clauses, which I am not happy and thought this will ruin my married life further and I don’t have any confident on their advocate. I specified in personal notice how and when she deserted me and mental cruelty against me by defaming me, abusing me, using vulgar words and I invited her to my house within 15days of this notice , failing which I’ll take steps according to Shariate law and law of land. She responded with a legal notice from her lawyer with all false allegations, which I even cannot imagine she could do that, it says, my mother demanded her to bring money from her parents, I tried to strangulate her, they spent 14lakh rupees for marriage as per my parents and my demand and many more lies and at end, Lawyer told their client(My wife) accepted my invitation with condition to take separate house and inform their client within 30days and discharge her from Shariate Law/Law of land. I was very angry and become red while I was reading the notice which is all of LIES. I sent her email ‘Are you aware of the contents?’ she didn’t replied. I sent her an email saying ‘I deny all allegations and come back to my house and as she want a separate house, my parents ‘ll moving permanently out of my house and only we two would be living in my house. It’s been 3 weeks now, but she didn’t respond to any email. I sms her /called her by she didn’t replied nor answered my calls. We don’t have kids.

What am I suppose to do now? Send her legal notice now asking her to return, as I sent only email to her(will email be considered as official reply to legal notice)? Qazi is ready to give Talaq on this ground but I want to understand what is in her mind and what does she want. I contacted local lawyer, he told it’s all a game to extract money and a threat to register case against me and my family, as she dragged my family members into this. Can she register any case if I give her Talaq before that? I am ready to go behind bar but I will not give her a single penny if she is doing this for money. Will it affect my job if I go behind bars for a day.? I work for private mnc organization.

Please dear Indian lawyers and my muslim brothers who faced similar threats, help me out to take decision and next step I am suppose to do.

I have been reading Vijay Sir’s answers from Delhi, but I could get answer for my issue. Can anyone refer a good advocate with the muslim’s divorce experience in Hyderabad .?

I appreciate your suggestions and help with prompt reply.

[doran]

Dear friend, End the confusion and go for divorce straight. The sooner you do the better and easier it is. Your wife like many other humans is trying to control you and let me tell you she has no respect or consideration what so ever for you or your parents. And the worst part is : it is never going to come also. Now, how to go about that i can't suggest bcz we hardly have any muslim population this side of the country.
All the best brother !!

[treasigh]

The best course of action in your case seems to me is to maintain strict stand even if you are forced to dissolve the marriage.
No doubt the attitude shown by your wife & her parents is not conciliatory and to settle this issue amicably by sending your wife back to you & resume the conjugal relationship, but as being guided by their lawyer, being informed to her that she won't be able to get huge amount of alimony from you in case the divorce takes place between both of you.
Being a Muslim marriage in event of Talaq, the maximum your wife can claim from you is the amount of mehar she was promised by you at the time of Nikha, three months maintenance during the 3 months period of triple talaq given by you and another three months maintenance during the iddat period.
Beyond this if she claims maintenance for herself she may not succeed, however the child maintenance she can claim from you & will get it too.
The small amount of money that she gets in any of these manner won't serve her desire to extract the huge sum of money nowadays married ladies get as permanent alimony from their husband even during the court proceedings in divorce cases, henceforth the drama to get you involved in all sort of false criminal complaints is being enacted by her side.
If you are ready to face all these false charges/complaints, even spend time & money in complete criminal prosecution in the court and by no means being intimidated by her to pay huge sum of money than please go ahead with divorce proceedings according to Shariate council and Qazi.

One thing I would like to add here for those parents who without giving a second thought to the future of their daughters are being misguided by members of my profession to file complaints under the D.V. Act, section 406,498A IPC, & Dowry Prohibition Act etc that you are not doing any good service towards the welfare of your daughters but digging their graves.
The women who indulge in such activities cannot get resettled in their life in future as whole world come to know their real history that you people (specially the mothers) want to wash with crocodile tears.