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[lifton]

My FIL is not just irritating but also very rude and criticises everything in the negative way. Though he is capable of working he has quit his job (he was working in private sector) and making my mother in law work and earn for a family of 8. (If he was in Govt sector he would have had atleast 10 more years of service left) He has hopped jobs once in 6 months- a year max. He is a very short tempered person and doesnot care about how much he hurts others; but when someone doesn't behave according to his expectations he screams at them and gets into his room and doesnot talk for weeks. I'm tired of doing all the household work for 8 people and he refuses to help us with any work at home and the entire day he just watched TV. Me and my MIL have to cook 3 types of dishes everyday for every meal. My MIL, my husband and I are the only earning members; being a man my FIL doesnt even mind making me work and spending my salary. Even the jokes he makes are demeaning- about people's illnesses or helplessness. When my parents, friends or relatives come home he comments about me in front of them. I have tried telling him in sober words not to do such things, but may be since an idle mind is a devils workshop, his main job is to throw tantrums.
My husband tells me to ignore him but I cant, because my FIL just keeps commenting and fighting and if we dont react he takes out the anger on my MIL by screeming at her or hitting her. I am looking for moving out but my husband feels bad abt leaving his parents and is scared of the extra responsibilities that come with moving out.
My questions are:
1. How do I deal with my irritating and forever irritated FIL?
2. How do I convince my husband to move out?
3. Is there any way I can help my MIL in her situation? I feel sorry for her.

[merla15]

Wait till he is asleep .

Then get the big frying pan out and swing it double handed as hard as you can across his face .

And when he has recovered enough to enquire why , tell him he is a complete ******** ,and that sooner or later he will have to go to sleep again , and that when he does you will repeat the treatment .

That'll alter things .

[chansomps]

Talk too her ask her why she puts up with him,my guess is that she scared