First off let me give you some background. I am sixteen, I have been a "Christian" all of my life (16 years) I am extremely mature, I am a Sunday School teacher, I am top of my class, never done drugs, had sex, done anything more immoral than tell a lie or fight with my siblings when I was younger. I am a pretty picture perfect kid. At the moment I am spending my summer vacation in a third world country preaching things that I don’t believe myself. I am really confused. I have seen miracles, sick people be healed, the blind be able to see, the lame be able to walk, but at this point in my life I don’t think that God exist.
I feel like the bible is a book up to have people do the right thing, to give hope and calm people. I mean it is great for that. It says that there is an all powerful being that can do anything that let people torture him to death so that you can be forgiven of your sins. That this being knows everything about you and what is more than that he designed you. That he loves everything about you. It just doesn’t make sense why a God who knows everything would create a race that he would grow to be upset with and flood the earth to kill them. That he would give man the power to do things that are wrong. That he would do the things that the bible says that he does.
Creation seems like it is impossible, evolution has its flaws as well. The thing that gets me the most are Christians themselves. I mean look at them. They are a sick breed of humans. They are some of the most backwards people that I have ever met. They preach on "love" but their actions speak louder than their words. They say that Christ came to Earth to share his love with every body. The bible says the Christ hung out with the worst of people. They people that society hated. Christians are supposed to be like Christ, I mean it is in their name. However, If you look at them they do just the opposite. They shun gays, people who have abortions, and anybody else they feel that they are more holy than. They always try and disprove Atheists. But how are they going to lead them to the lord if they point figures and shout that they are going to hell and be rude to them. That is not showing them love.
What I am really looking for is just how to know if God exists. In the back of my head there is a voice saying that he is real, but I think that is just my mind. It is the same voice that I thought was God when I was a Christian and it is still here now. I think I am crazy. I don’t know if anybody out there can help me, but please help me if you can.
And for all the Atheists out there who want to post that God does not exist and not to waste my time. I am sorry for how Christians treat you. How they rub your face in the dirt trying to win in an argument. I am truly sorry. If there is a God out there he most certainly would not want people to treat you that way.
Sincerly,
Just a confused teenage boy.

