I cant stand my girlfriends family, what to do?

[ryscford]

Sorry this is long.

I have been with my girlfriends for 2 years, she is so sweet and I love her so much, and our relationship is really good, we are both late 20’s. But the thing is I really really don’t like her family. They are loud, obnoxious, they fight with each other in front of people, they have drama. Her sister has young kids that they don’t control and let run crazy. Her brother in law is always pissed off, and her brother is a drunk. When they see me, they say hi, but that’s it.

Neither her mom nor her sister respect my girlfriend. Her mom yells at her and speaks to her like a child. This woman cries all the time causing drama if she does not get her way. I brought my family to my girlfriend’s house last year, and her mom actually started choking up crying in font of them, throwing a tantrum because of something minor. Also, my girlfriend was preparing dinner for us, and she was so frustrated because her own family would not help her. My mom wanted to get up and help her but felt that she couldn’t because she thought her mom would give her attitude. Even when my sister tried to help clear off the table later, her mom gave her a mean look like “what are you doing in my kitchen”. But even her mom wasn’t helping clearing the table or cooking or anything. Her family did not lift a finger to make my family feel welcome. For this reason, my family does not want to get together with her family again, and I won’t subject them to that.

I tried to get past how they are...but every time I see them, it gets worse.

The main thing is I don’t like how they treat my girlfriend…and my girlfriend is blind to all of this. Every time she invites me to do something with her family, I try to decline, but she takes me so wrong. I talked to her about this, and she felt like I was attacking her family and she gets defensive. Then she starts to try to level the playing field by saying stuff about my mom or my family that isn’t true, when I get mad, she says I have no right to get mad because I am the one who started talking sh*t about her family first. This really pisses me off. She says she knows how they are, but there’s nothing she can do

I don’t know if I am wrong, or if I am being too rough. I hate going to her family because I feel SOO awkward when they start fighting or crying in front of me or disrespecting my girl in front of me, and I feel like I have no right to say anything. Also now that my girl sees I don’t want to see her family she almost pushes me or makes me feel guilty when I say I don’t want to go. Am I wrong? Should I just hold my tongue and continue this?

[chozai65]

GOD NO.
you're not wrong. your girlfriends obviously used too their behaviour where as you probably live in a more kind, stable family.
simple solution, get married and get a job offer FAR FAR away. ;-)