My daughter is 12. I want custody but she says the law states she can make her own mind up at 12? True?

by **alburt** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:03 am

My daughter is in a bad situation with her mother but is loyal to her. Her mother was recently busted for drugs/distributing/intent to sell and has had a long history of DUIs etc. She's already kicked my son out on he's in my custody. What age in Tennessee must you be to choose where you live?

by **laureano97** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:05 am

NOT true. Are you seriously taking legal advice from a 12 year old?

The court *might* ask her for her preference, but no child under 18, no matter how old, gets the final say as to who they will live with. Not in the U.S.

by **jerard** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:11 am

After 12, court will ask for her will...and her decision will be final...

by **wahchintonka48** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:14 am

Well the mother has had a lot of trouble. I don't see any problem with you going to Child Protective Custody, and getting custody of her. I am really surprised the law hasn't taken the girl from her already. The legal age of a child to declare who they want to live with, I believe is 15 in most states. But under your circumstances, I do not think you will have a problem getting custody of the girl. good luck.

by **reid** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:18 am

What I hate about us married people with children is that we do stuff that destroy the marriages, and disadvantage our children, We then spend the next hundred years blaming each other and creating an even worse situation for our children. We go to court and fight over our children as if we love them when we actually do not. A parent who loves his/her children would create the best secure environment for those children and that is for them to live with both loving parents having no arguments.

We then introduce the worse possibly thing in our children's lives. Step parents. There is nothing worse to a child than a step parent and in many cases nothing worse to a new spouse than a step child. Read the write up on them Its terrible.

What is a 12 year old supposed to do? Leave a sick mother and go and live with her dad? Yes that is what is safe for her but imagine how she is looking at it. Nobody to look after her mother so she feels she has to do it herself at age 12.

Read about 9 year old parents from HIV infested southern Africa and understand that we are doing the same to our children, minus the disease.

To answer your question: Yes at 12 the court asks what the child wants to do before passing judgement. It is a terrible question to ask a 12 year old to choose between mum and dad. But do not blame the judge. it is mum and dad who decided to divorce and cause her to start thinking which one to live with.

Divorce in USA is around 50% and affects millions of children adversely. And it is all caused by us, parents when we get selfish and forget our responsibilities to our innocent children.

by **scirwode** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:24 am

she will be able to make up her own mind however, if the mother is seen to be an unfit parent her decision will not be final

by **teithi71** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:31 am

12 0R 13 CALL a free attorney and ask.

by **oded** » Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:38 am

In my experience the courts will ask a child age 12 or older what there preference is and that will be what the decision is unless she is in a dangerous environment... my 8 yr old niece was just given the choice of which parent she wanted to live with

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