Anyone have advice on how to minimize my ex getting visitation rights with my daughter? He's addicted to meth

by **geol19** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 8:46 am

He just got out of rehab and he's trying to persue court ordered visitation. He has one heck of a shady divorce/family law lawyer pushing him to do it, even though he keeps repeatedly saying he is still struggling and is thinking about going back into rehab. I really don't have money for a lawyer and need ideas about what to ask for in mediation since the ball _IS_ in my court.

Just so you know, if he were still here in state I wouldn't have such a problem with him coming to see her and things of that nature, but he is on the east coast, and I live in the midwest. I seriously have issues with him taking her so far away!! Any ideas, anyone out there who's been through a similar situation??

BTW, my ex is pretty impressionable as far as what I say to him buy his lawyer always seems to smooth him over. If he takes me to mediation I really want to make it hard for him.

by **hurst** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 8:47 am

He just got out of rehab and he's trying to persue court ordered visitation. He has one heck of a shady divorce/family law lawyer pushing him to do it, even though he keeps repeatedly saying he is still struggling and is thinking about going back into rehab. I really don't have money for a lawyer and need ideas about what to ask for in mediation since the ball _IS_ in my court.

Just so you know, if he were still here in state I wouldn't have such a problem with him coming to see her and things of that nature, but he is on the east coast, and I live in the midwest. I seriously have issues with him taking her so far away!! Any ideas, anyone out there who's been through a similar situation??

BTW, my ex is pretty impressionable as far as what I say to him buy his lawyer always seems to smooth him over. If he takes me to mediation I really want to make it hard for him.

Get your local child, health and welfare involed. Like social services, HRS or what ever the organization is called in your area. They can restrict a parent of visitation rights and boy that will hold up in court. I know from experience. However, if you plan on seeing him that will cause trouble for you and you could lose your child. They may allow visitation, but it would have to be supervised. You can also try a counseler for your daughter. They can also back you and help you with the process.

If he gets your daughter out of state you could be in serious trouble. It is not worth it for the authorities to get involved and then you will be dealing with another set of laws. What if you can't find them?

Watch out for his attorney and if u can afford one get one asap. Those shady attorneys can really put you and your child in a bad position. I hate attorneys.

Make sure your daughter's school knows what is going on too and forward all information to them. Don't give permission to let him pick her up or they could be gone.

Also, go to the courts and try for temporary custody before the real custody hearing comes up to protect u now. If you need to file for a restraining order. There are a lot of restrictions you can put on him for you and your daugher.

I really feel for you. Hope this helps. The best of luck to you.

If you need to talk just e-mail me or find me on im under same user name. Glad to help any way I can.

by **hillocke** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 8:52 am

Hire a PI to get pictures of him buying/using meth.

by **caomh** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 9:05 am

find out about legal aid resources in your county or about the possibility of getting a law guardian appointed for your daughter

by **mate** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 9:24 am

tell the judge you want him tested for drugs, and NOT a urine test either

by **sebastiano** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 9:27 am

if he takes you to court bring up his addiction and request a drug test

by **cuartio52** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 9:32 am

Family services should be able to help.

by **crosbey** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 9:35 am

Family services should be able to help.

I've got a couple ideas. The more direct approach would be to put him in jail for Meth possession. That might be a little too harsh.

The other approach, and perhaps more reasonsable, is to demand supervision by the state whenever your child is in his custody. Perhaps maybe you could just have your supervision and not the state?? The fact is, there is no way if you are the principal guardian that he could take her back to the east coast.

Good Luck!

by **dodya** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 9:48 am

Contact your county attorney's office. Someone should be able to direct you to Legal Aid. They base their fees on income, sometimes they will even do it for free. Good Luck to you and your daughter!

by **dent81** » Sun Oct 30, 2011 9:57 am

what about having family and childrens services check him out and have them determine if he is fit he will have to go for drug testing regularily and might end up with supervised visits

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