Guest paying their own meals at a wedding, how do you write that on an invitation?

by **vaiveatoish** » Wed Jul 18, 2012 12:32 pm

Yes like others said, do a potluck. Write on the invitation - each guest bring one or more plates of food. That should solve the problem, with luck there will be more than enough, even for doubles and triples of food!

Good luck!

by **jen** » Wed Jul 18, 2012 12:33 pm

Love how you pretend to know that what you're planning is tacky, yet you think there should still be an exception made for you. LOL

Dude, you've been posting this and re-posting this more times than I care to remember. The answer is not going to change. It's tacky. Get it through your head. If you want to go ahead and be tacky, then go ahead and be tacky, but at least be honest about it. There is no way to be "cute" about it or to phrase it in a "clever" way.

by **ahanu** » Wed Jul 18, 2012 12:40 pm

Love how you pretend to know that what you're planning is tacky, yet you think there should still be an exception made for you. LOL

Dude, you've been posting this and re-posting this more times than I care to remember. The answer is not going to change. It's tacky. Get it through your head. If you want to go ahead and be tacky, then go ahead and be tacky, but at least be honest about it. There is no way to be "cute" about it or to phrase it in a "clever" way.

Please be so kind to understand that as much as we would like to we just cannot so you please be expecting to pay for your meal. We very much want to share our day with you and this is unfortunately the only way we can do it. If you could oblige us then we would be greatly appreciative.

by **lathrop** » Wed Jul 18, 2012 12:44 pm

Ok I personally would never do what you are doing but here goes:
Can you find out the amount that it will cost the guests. Can you ask the venue where the wedding will be? So if it is 100 dollars ( that is usually the very minimum it costs ) simply have it written at the bottom of the invitation:
'Cost for each guest will be one hundred dollars. No credit cards accepted so please bring cash.'
( or if there are credit cards accepted, write ' credit cards accepted'.)
That is the only' nice verse' way you can word it so that it is clear, since many people do not take the time to read the verse in a rhyme and would not ' get it' that they themselves will be paying for going to a wedding. Thats why I wrote it out bluntly. Otherwise they will come, say they left their credit card at home and have no cash so could they please owe it to you and they will not pay you ever.
I wish you the very best wedding!

by **dana** » Wed Jul 18, 2012 12:56 pm

Well I can definitely sympathize. We had saved up a little over $10,000 for our wedding, and as I started making plans I was like this is stupid we can put that as a down-payment towards a house. Which we did and then we eloped. But you need to do what is right for you and your families. I don't know what Australian / New Zeland (?) culture is but I assume it is pretty much the same as in the US. Here, it is customary for you to bring a wedding gift - which people don't give you if you elope. Often there is a "Cash Bar" where the guests all have to pay for their own drinks. I would think that you could do something along that lines. "(Cash Bar / Cash Dinner)" on the actual invitation the line under the reception location. Also, then you are going to want to specify on your RSVP card the amount. Like Chicken $20, Beef $24 or whatever so when people pick their meal they see the price. This should give everyone plenty of time to all ask questions ahead of time. Now, honestly I can not see an easy way for this to go at the reception without it taking over your event. You don't want people placing orders and paying and trying to figure that all out at the reception. My recommendation is that you do whatever it is you want to do - assume that people will pay for their dinner ahead of time or maybe in a little box (with tasteful instructions) before they walk in the door. So you pick up the tab at the actual event and hopefully the money you got will cover most of it. And then be prepared for some people not to pay and you having to make up the difference. Because we all know it is going to happen and then at least you won't have a scene. You are also going to want to make sure that the Cash Bar works like normal since that is easy enough to control. Oh and when you figure your prices make sure to include tip and what not. Just give them a flat even amount.

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