Paternity

[Hinto]

Hello, my question is a mother just claimed me as the father of her child and I want to know given the circumstance what my options are. The mother was married to another man at the time of conception and living with him. I had no idea she was married or living with another man. She was some months pregnant after our affair ended. I had no knowledge of this pregnancy. I guess she lied to her husband and kept her affair a secret 3 to 4 yrs later, she got a divorce. Then challenged me for paternity, to my shock after about 8yrs I just found out she was married and that she had a baby and she says I’m the father. I believe that I am the father after seeing the kid. I have not taken a blood test but the court sent me a letter asking to say yes or no that I’m the father. Not having knowledge of this I got married later in life and father 2 kids. Now I find out this news and that I may be in serious debt more than 50 or 60 thousand. Is there a way that I refuse to pay this money or give up the rights and not support the child? My reason for saying this is I believe this shocking news and instant debt would end my marriage I have now and separate me from all my kids.  Can she claim me as the father after all this years and her being married?  I believe her affairs were discovered and her husband request a paternity test for their kids and was found not to be the father of any of the 4. Is there a statue of limitations for calming paternity if you’re married? They say if I say no to test that I will have to take one or be claimed as the father by default. Will this hold up in the U.S. without a paternity test? Will they be able to make me pay or garnish my wages if I refuse test. I don’t think its fair she put so many men is this situation I assume the same is happening with the other fathers of the remaining 3 kids that she claims are all different men.

She wait all this time then cash out about probably about $200,000 because all the father are in debt without knowledge but will be penalized for it. I kind of fell it’s like a person secretly using your credit card for 8 yrs then you one day get the bill in the mail and the interest has been going. When even if you wanted to pay you were not provided that option to settle your debt. This woman is German and I am staying in Germany to at the moment I’m American.

I have the option to leave the country before being served with official court papers or court orders. I would like to handle this situation. Also with that being said my number one priority is keeping my family I have now together by any means.

[Johann]

Dear Drrrian:

Unfortunately for you, there is no statute of limitation for an action to declare the biological father to be the legal father of a child, because the interests of the child have absolute priority. That means, that if the former husband has successfully challenged his fatherhood in court and has been adjudicated not to be the father, there is no bar to an action to adjudicate you to be the father. Additionally, it is correct that you could be found to be the father, if you refuse a DNA test, which you could by leaving the country, though not by default. Rather than on default such decision by the court would be based on an assumption, if it is undisputed or there is enough prove that you had a sexual relationship with the mother during the theoretical period of conception. Whether the sole testimony of the mother is to be considered sufficient evidence, is in the discretion of the court.

Unfortunately, it is also true that you are liable for child support from the birth of the child. However, most of the arrears would not be owed to the child, leave alone the mother, but to the former husband, who provided such support in some form for the majority of the time. Whether he will actually claim such arrears, I cannot tell. However, if he does bring such claim at a time at which you are living in the States, he might have to bring an action there or at least have to enforce any judgement that he does obtain in Germany abroad. That might strongly increase the chances for a reasonable settlement. Of course, you will have to pay current child support, if you are found to be the father.

In general, I would advise to inform your wife about the situation, because you probably will not be able to keep it a secret forever and, if your wife is a halfway reasonable person, she will not blame you for fathering a child before you ever met her and cannot blame you for not telling her something you did not know yourself. However, if you try to keep it a secret and comes to light after some time, things will be dramatically different.

Best regards,

Peter Koch, LL.M., MBA

Attorney at Law(licensed in Germany and New York)

KOCHLAW

Schuetzenstrasse 76a

22761 Hamburg

Germany

Tel. +49-40-8079364-40

Fax +49-40-8079364-41

e-mail: [email protected]

web: www.kochlaw.de